Whether you stayed in last night and cuddled with your sweetie and a bottle of Dom, got glammed up for a night on the town, or something in between, I hope last night was exactly what you needed it to be!

We had a low-key gathering of a few friends and family, with sake cocktails and sushi, while little Margaux slept upstairs. It was a great night, and it felt awesome to be able to let go of the expectation to make New Years epic, and just go with the flow.

That’s been a definite theme of the last year — letting things happen as they are meant to, letting go of my need to control and plan everything within an inch of it’s life — which usually tends to lead to disappointment and frustration when things don’t go my way (for more on all that, check out my posts on leaving New York City, our struggle with getting pregnant, and our birth story).

Maybe you’ve been experiencing something similar in your life… Perhaps you had an idea of what you wanted to accomplish this past year — losing 20 lbs, making a 6 figure salary, finding your soulmate, getting pregnant, traveling more, buying a house, revitalizing your relationship…etc. etc. etc.  And maybe you found that things took a different turn and didn’t go exactly as you had planned.  And you got frustrated, and down on yourself, maybe a little hopeless. Or maybe you were able to adapt on the fly and make the most of what did come your way.

In either case, I propose we go into 2016 differently.  Instead of setting resolutions about losing weight, getting engaged, making more money, etc. etc., let’s focus on our intention for the year.  What overarching theme are you seeking? What emotions are you craving?

If you take a little time this way to gain clarity about what you would like this year to bring (and why), the odds of having the year of your dreams increases exponentially.

Try these 3 simple steps for going into 2016 with intention:

1. Focus on how you want to feel: A successful and joyful year doesn’t come from gym resolutions or green juices, but it does sprout from zeroing in on how you want to feel.  Be it strong, confident, loved, supported, vibrant, adventurous — try to really focus on one or two feelings that you want to elicit this year, on a regular basis.  If you’re having trouble, think of what feelings your goals would inspire.  Would losing 15 lbs. make you feel more beautiful or confident?  Would getting a raise help you feel more successful or appreciated?
2. Set the tone: Nothing will come from randomly “deciding” that this year will be the one when you’ll start hitting the gym 4 days a week while you walk by Equinox on your way to work, or resolving to date more when you see a cute couple huddled together at a restaurant.  These rushed, impulsive resolutions never come to fruition.  Instead, set the tone for your experience and intention setting in an environment that inspires you.   Have the intention setting session mirror what you want to create for your year.  If you want to create more calm and self-care, schedule yourself a spa day or massage, then bring your notebook to a juice bar for a little post-relaxation visualization.  If you want to experience more fulfilling relationships or more fun, schedule an intention-setting evening with some close friends and a few bottles of wine.  You get the idea…
3. Flesh out your vision: Now that you have any idea of how you want to feel and have creating an inspiring session, you can start brainstorming other actions that bring about the feeling you’re chasing this year.  Think outside the box here.  Say you want to feel more confident.. yes, losing a few pounds will help, but what other things can you do bring that about?  Maybe taking up rock climbing, signing up for a writing class, or getting some new items of clothing that make you feel great.

Me? I want to cultivate patience, mindfulness, and calm this year. I’m going to create that with meditation, keeping my days with my baby slow and sweet, not over-scheduling, and trying to breathe before I react.  What will you create in your 2016?